One Year Of Discipline, Day 21: How I Freed Myself From A Nightmare

One Year Of Discipline

Back when I was 10-year-old, I would often wake up at 5 am in the morning, only to fall asleep again a couple of minutes later. I dreaded these extra sleep times, though there was hardly any way I could get around them. I was simply too tired.

Why did I dread these extra periods of sleep? Because I always got stuck in one of the worst nightmares.

I was trapped inside my dream.

And could not get out. It was an odd time of the day, people were there, walking around, often hurrying. They were merely a blur. I could never see their faces, except when I tried to communicate. They would sneer at me and tell me that I was trapped.

Ok, guys, you had your fun. Now it’s time for me to leave.

“You wanna go home? You can’t. You are in this with us together.”

And there I was, with no way of waking up. I realized time was a fluid concept and went about much more slowly in my dream than in the real world. I was horrified.

When I eventually woke up, I dearly hoped such a dream would never occur again. Yet it did. Night after night. Morning after morning.

I realized then and there that I had to do something against it. I had to take action if I wanted to end this string of bad dreams.

How did I free myself from these nightmares?

I realized that there was – amongst all the feelings of being trapped – some faint resemblance of reality in my dream: I was self-conscious. I knew I was in a dream. Otherwise I would have never been able to have the feeling of déja-vu. The impression of “ugh, here we go again”.

And that was good news! Because with even the faintest trace of awareness of what was going on, there was hope I would not just be a victim.

Maybe I could become more conscious I was in a dream? That was the first step towards my eventual goal: to simply walk out on my nightmare.

Here are the next steps I took to rid myself from my nightmares.

#1 – Anticipating my bad dreams.

I did not just stumble into the next nightmare, I expected the dream. I knew what was coming. That way, I was prepared while at the same time connected to reality – aka the outside world – while in my dream.

This was an important first step. It was as if I was trapped underwater, but still able to poke a hole through the ice cover. With a connection to the outside, I knew I could eventually escape.

#2 – Determining a concrete escape hatch.

Even if I could escape my dreams, how would I do it? I was clueless as to which door to open to get out. Maybe doors or side roads weren’t the solution then… but wait: all my dreams – not only the bad ones – almost always stopped when I was falling to my death. So I decided that was a way out for me.

I would climb on top of the highest building I could find. There, I would throw myself off the edge, down to my demise… and wake up.

Does that sound familiar? Well… remember the movie “Inception”? The characters would wake from any dream by inducing a falling motion.

THAT is what I wanted to create. That was my ticket to freedom.

#3 – Relentlessly working on regaining consciousness

One obstacle on my path to freedom was my prevalent passivity in my dreams. Things “happened” to me. I mostly reacted to anything that occurred in the dream, and as a result, I would never venture on my own.

So I really told myself to walk freely inside my dream every time when I fell asleep. At first, nothing happened.

And then, slowly and dream after dream, I was able to do a little bit more of what I wanted. It felt like slowly learning to walk again inside my dream. I pushed against a thick layer of unconsciousness bearing down on me. It was as if I was walking through molasses in the fog. But every day, I could do a little more.

And then, after half a year of constantly trying, I finally found my building and flew away.

The nightmare never came back afterwards.

Apparently, what I did back then was lucid dreaming – being aware that I was in a dream. Back when I tried to free myself from those dreams, I had no official training in influencing my dreams.

I just included my story to show you it can be done by pure willpower.

Feel free to contact me under

if you are experiencing a nightmare you want to get out of, and I can tell you a bit more on my own experience.

 All the best, and good luck!



Summary of Day 21

Below you will find

(a) a quick description how I fared on my main goals – losing body fat, working on my blog, installing good habits;

(b) my thoughts for the day;

(c) how the rest of the program went and whether there were any irregularities or other noteworthy points.

Day 21

Losing body fat

Body fat down: 22.4% again.

Breakfast: Coffee, Protein shake, Eggs.

Nothing for lunch, Mozzarella and tomatoes for dinner.

Today’s juice: Cabbage carrot juice. Just a couple of weeks ago, I would have never thought I’d juice a whole head of broccoli rage together with carrots and actually drink it! You can find the recipe here or in Juicing for Power. (*)

Calisthenics routine:

All 120 push-ups in good from. It still takes me a while and several interruptions to finish them. But I am getting there!

120 squats in good form.

120 sit-ups in good form.

Working on my blog

I wrote this blog post here.


(a) Emotional Health: I am seeing one very positive effect of opening up to people more over the last days – people treat me much more openly. Everybody becomes more personal – much better than before. And really not distracting at all from my work.

(b) Spiritual Health: I continued the Happiness Habit. What was I grateful for?

What am I grateful for today?
1. Getting enough sleep.
2. Getting up early
3. Focusing on my priorities.

(c) Mental Health.

10 ways to train yourself to lucid dream.
1. Make a conscious decision to push against unconsciousness.
2. Train yourself to act upon seeing a specific object in your dream.
3. Paint the dream upon waking up, so you can memorize where you stopped.
4. Say out loud the last action in your dream before you woke up, so you can get right back into the dream.
5. Visualize yourself in the dream, but with taking action.
6. Try talking to people in your dream and ask them for a way out.
7. Day dream more often to get used that dreams are a normal part of your life.
8. Talk to your doctor and let him give you some drugs.
9. Try to be proactive in falling asleep.
10. Embrace that dreams are a part of your mind.

Thoughts for the day

What did I do well?
I tackled the first steps and experiments for publishing the manuscript fast.

What do I want to improve?
I could be more efficient – I am only slowly getting to sleep.

How will I improve?
Get more sleep, once again – I’ll probably have to wait for the weekend to fully recharge.

The rest of the “30-Days of Discipline” items went fine.

Video Summary Day 21


To check the description of the “One Year of Discipline” challenge, click here.

To see yesterday’s post, click here.

To get back to the homepage, click here.

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